{"id":1281,"date":"2006-07-21T22:53:34","date_gmt":"2006-07-21T22:53:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/?p=1281"},"modified":"2006-07-21T22:53:34","modified_gmt":"2006-07-21T22:53:34","slug":"look_what_i_can","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/?p=1281","title":{"rendered":"Look What I Can Do"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was at a barbecue earlier this evening where there were some young children in attendance.  While they were a bit wary of me at first, they eventually grew comfortable enough around me to start demonstrating assorted feats of body mechanics.  They beamed with pride as they contorted fingers, knees, and other joints into wince-inducing positions.  Not one to be outdone, I instructed them to watch me as I performed my patented ear wiggle maneuver.  The kids ate it up and I think they respected me just a bit more afterwards.  But one tot couldn’t understand why I kept refusing the half-eaten hot dog he shoved against my mouth. <\/DIV>
 <\/DIV>
I may never have children of my own, but I’m fairly confident in my ability to assume the role of cool uncle, should I be so called upon.  <\/DIV><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was at a barbecue earlier this evening where there were some young children in attendance.  While they were a bit wary of me at first, they eventually grew comfortable enough around me to start demonstrating assorted feats of body mechanics.  They beamed with pride as they contorted fingers, knees, and other joints into wince-inducing […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1281","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","category-1-id","post-seq-1","post-parity-odd","meta-position-corners","fix"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9Iwau-kF","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1281","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1281"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1281\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1281"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1281"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the19thfloor.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1281"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}