Extreme Makeover

I came across my high school senior picture today. My nurse looked at it and, not knowing when the picture was taken, said something like, “Is this you in the eighth grade? You looked good back then.”

Needless to say, I’ve spent the rest of the day sitting in front of my computer, privately moping. But I am going to hunt around on eBay for circa-1990 eyeglass frames that cover half my face. Maybe that’s the accessory that will get girls to like me; the missing element that will transform me from borderline “meh” to slightly-less-borderline “meh”. I can’t say that the big glasses did anything for me back in high school, but now the whole retro look is back in fashion. I might even still have that denim shirt in the back of my closet.