If you’ve already started your holiday shopping (and really, who hasn’t?) in the hopes of finding me the perfect gift, might I direct you to the pages of the Neiman Marcus Christmas catalog? I’ve got my eye on the dinner at the Algonquin Hotel with literary and political luminaries like Malcolm Gladwell, Nora Ephron, Henry Louis Gates, Jr., and George Stephanopoulous. The cost is two hundred grand, so you might want to pool your money with all my Facebook friends. I’ll hold an essay contest to decide who will be my dinner companion. The topic will be “The Ninety-Nine Ways in which Mark Is Totally Awesome”. Extra credit if you can make it an even hundred. Afterwards, I’ll post pictures to the blog of John Lithgow drunkenly re-enacting scenes from Ricochet and of me and Stephanopoulous arm-wrestling after dessert.
C’mon, it’s either this or a book that I probably won’t get to for at least two or three years.
I can name at least one way that Mark is awesome: his safeword is “spongecake”. Best.safeword.ever.