Living in a downtown high-rise has certain advantages. No lawns to mow. No driveways to shovel. Plenty to see and do within walking distance. But then there are the drawbacks. Like the building’s fire alarm going off at 2:30 in the morning for no apparent reason. It seemed to go on for at least a half hour, although that might have been an exaggeration of my sleep-deprived brain. I’m not sure what I would have done if the building had truly been on fire. I’m imagining my nurse dragging my naked body feet-first down nineteen flights of stairs and getting trampled by other oblivious and frightened residents. I think I might decide instead to stuff wet towels under the door and hope things turn out for the best.

Here are the results of my attempt to insert myself into the Mad Men universe. I know that it doesn’t quite look like me, but the website didn’t offer a big-ass wheelchair or a ventilator as accessories, so I had to work with what they had. Now that I think about it, I suppose the vent would have to be some retro affair with lots of vacuum tubes and diodes. I do think the newspaper and pipe, combined with the honeymoon suite setting, give me a certain IBM-geek-after-dark allure. Don’t you agree?

Watch this brilliant economist try to scare CNN viewers with these ominous words:
[J]ust wait till you see Medicare, Medicaid … done by the government.

I happened to be paying very close attention on the day we talked about Medicaid in law school and I’m pretty certain it’s a government-run program. And the fact that I’m alive, living at home, and not lying in my own filth tells me the government is doing something right.
There are plenty of legitimate criticisms to be directed against the health care legislation pending in Congress. It may not do enough to reduce skyrocketing costs. Its proposed financing mechanisms are gimmicky. It’s a giveaway to private insurers. But listening to most Republicans talk about health care is a depressing and wearisome experience. Whatever basic understanding they have of the policy issues involved is completely overwhelmed by their all-consuming fear of government.

Here’s a scene of self-styled “patriots” trying to shout down Rep. Lloyd Doggett (D-TX), a supporter of health care reform, outside a grocery store.

It makes my wonkish heart go pitter-patter to see people get all excited about public plans and health insurance exchanges. But the crowd’s overwrought pitchforks-and-torches vibe negates my enthusiasm. Most of these people probably couldn’t articulate exactly why they oppose health care reform so vehemently, except to string together a few disjointed sentences that rely heavily on the words “socialism”, “France”, and “freedom”. But progressives can’t afford to dismiss these theatrics out of hand. Unruly mobs make for good television and the media are lazy enough to show videos like the one above and proclaim that Americans are strongly opposed to health care reform.

Instead, we need to call these people for what they are: unwitting lackeys of corporations and conservative ideologues who prefer the dysfunctional status quo to any alternative. But even that’s not enough. We need to keep reminding people that, under the current system, a job loss means loss of insurance. We need to remind people that, under the current system, individual policies can be rescinded, And under the current system, insurers can charge exorbitant premiums and co-pays.

Most importantly, these protesters and their masters have no serious ideas of their own to address these problems. Whatever bill gets passed will by no means be perfect. Reform is an iterative process that requires time and a healthy measure of patience. We are a nation of tinkerers and risk-takers, which makes the empty, fearful slogans and authoritarian tactics of these protesters seem all the more foreign and sadly desperate. 

The rat pictured above was injected with a blue food dye after having its spinal cord damaged. The dye appears to reduce the trauma of such injuries and perhaps even promotes partial healing. Take that, organic foodies.

I’m beginning to suspect that a cure for SMA will have a similar trade-off. We’ll still attract stares, but it will be because we traded our disabilities in for prehensile tails or hooves.