I see that my arch-nemesis, Stephen Hawking, has published the first in a series of children’s science fiction books. The man will do anything for a bit of good PR. To the children of the world: Dr. Hawking is not a nice man. During our last phone conversation to finalize the details of our zero-g deathmatch, he threatened to do things with my corpse that even the Dark Lord himself would consider beyond the pale. But for a man of such bravado, he seems to have no problem coming up with excuses to delay our face-off. “I have to papers to grade.” “I have relatives coming in from out of town.” I suppose the next time I talk to him, it will be “I have to finish my book tour.” Coward.