A new high-rise condominium development is going up on the block adjacent to my workplace, The sales website promises “five-star amenities” and generally makes the building sound like the closest thing to a yuppified heaven on Earth. I like the notion of a thirty-second commute to work, but any inclination I had to make a serious inquiry about the availability of units was quickly disspelled when I realized one thing with jarring clarity–I would have to live in downtown St. Paul. The last time I found myself in downtown St. Paul at night, I nearly died from a sense of unbearable loneliness. A bramble of tumbleweed drifted through an intersection as my desperate cries for human companionship echoed among the deserted office buildings.
Now, I certainly intend no offense to my many friends who call St. Paul home. Many areas of the city are quite lovely. However, I think I’ll remain a Minneapolitan for the time being and admire your fair environs from afar.
