Note to self: if I find myself in front of a judge facing serious prison time, don’t try using the pity-me-I’m-a-poor-cripple defense because the judge probably won’t buy it. A Minnesota man with quadriplegia recently learned this harsh lesson when a federal judge recently sentenced him to five years plus change for possessing child pornography. The judge ruled out home confinement for the man because it wouldn’t be sufficient punishment and I can’t disagree with that sentiment. But I can’t imagine he will get the same level of care he received at home.
I’m not sure how well I would adjust to prison life. Maybe I’d be the jailhouse lawyer; the guy everyone comes to when they need help writing a letter to the warden or parole board. But whatever I earned in cigarettes would probably have to go to the hired muscle protecting my…er…honor.
I’d better make sure I don’t have any unpaid parking tickets.
Thanks to Rose for the tip.
