My Dear Professor Hawking:
Let me be one of the first to congratulate you on your receipt of the Presidential Medal of Freedom. It’s well-deserved, I’m sure. Please give the President my warmest regards when you see him and also inquire as to whether he has firmed up a departure date for our shuttle trip to the space station. I need a little advance notice so that I can put in my vacation request at work. Some of us don’t have the luxury of skipping town whenever the impulse strikes.
Incidentally, you might want to consider wearing your newly-acquired medal for the fight. Television audiences love their bling. And it might make you seem a little less pathetic after you crumble like a stale cookie, unable to withstand my brutal lesson in physics.
Salutations & Felicitations,
MS
